Cynthia Rebecca Nine Days Old

Myers-Briggs

I decided to take the test just for giggles even though I already knew my type. And bam! I'm an INTP baby, same as before. I did notice my Intuitive score wasn't as high as it was last time I took this test but it's still conclusive. I agree with my Enneagram types as well, especially the need to stay focused and teh stubborn part. I don't think I'm all that physically affectionate though.

Let's see if this works:

Conscious self	Overall self

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Letter to an Anal Retentive

To all you Type A, Meyers-Briggs ISTJ personalities out there, God bless you. I’m sure this world couldn’t function without you, but you sure make that functioning difficult. For me at least. My Meyers-Briggs profile is INTP – Introvert Intuitive Thinking Perceptive. I only differ from you ISTJ’s (Introvert Sensing Thinking Judging) by two letters but it’s those two letters that so diametrically oppose us. You see the world in black and white absolutes. I see it as a complex continuum. You focus on the urgency at hand. I look to the future. You see the beauty of the parts. I see the sum of the whole. You find comfort in the concrete. I thrive in the abstract. Neither one of us is right or wrong. But I’m easier to get along with.

Please stop castigating me with your rounding differences and minor discrepancies. Your technicalities and decimal places. Just because I don’t see their relevancy doesn’t mean I’m less conscientious than you. I’m just not as precise. Again, I’m looking at the Big Picture, the Grand Scheme, the Whole Enchilada. Is it really so important that the reinsurance offset on Gross Case Reserves ties to the penny? It’s a Balance Sheet entry for Christ’s sake! The only person who would really care, besides you, is the actuary and I have news for you, he DOESN’T CARE!

Excuse me for that outburst but I am exasperated beyond all measure. These details are slowly strangling me. Yes, technically you are correct. Thank you for pointing out my oversight, especially to the CFO, and for convincing her it’s a grievous oversight at that. I know how you relish exposing other’s mistakes because, really, you only have the good of the company at heart and would never try to cast other’s in a negative light just so you could shine all the more brightly in comparison. So again, ISTJ, I say God bless you. I’m sure wiser powers than me know why you're here and what your purpose is. I'm not egocentric enough to think it's just to vex me, although it sure feels that way sometimes. We have no choice but to coexist, side by side, cube by cube. I will overlook your transgressions of personality and team building if you will please get off my back. Let's go have a drink after work. You could sure use it.

Baby Carrots

I freakin' hate buying baby carrots. You know, that little plastic bag filled with little minature tender sweet carrots. The carrots in the brand new bag I bought are spoiled...again!! How disgusting is it to reach your hand into a newly opened bag expecting to draw out a cool crisp tasty treat only to find your hand covered in noxious orange mucous? On Thursday I bought a bag of carrots and a container of hummus to keep in the fridge at work knowing I'd be working on Saturday. I opened the bag yesterday (Friday), had a few carrots (they were fine) and put the bag back in the fridge. Just moments ago I got the bag out of the fridge, opened the hummus, stuck my hand in the bag and...slime!! It was disgusting. And what's worse is now I have to furtively raid my co-worker's snack drawer for something to dip in my hummus. I wouldn't mind so much except that I may get caught and God knows I don't want to be exposed for commiting that most heinous of workplace sins...Stealing Thy Co-Worker's Food. My only other alternative is to eat the hummus with my fingers and I'm doing that as I type. Dammit. Now I have to go out and get something to eat. Hummus by itself is not exactly filling. Damn you baby carrots!!!!

Do We Have To Get Political?

I like to consider myself fairly apathetic when it comes to politics in general. I have enough drama in my own life without worrying about what nasty things the Republicans are saying about the Democrats now. But dammit, after watching the DNC the last four nights I feel fairly riled up. I don’t have time for this shit. I’m too slow and ignorant to argue politics with anyone and Republicans just seem to piss me off without having to say anything anyways. I’m a registered Democrat and I have voted Clinton, Clinton, Gore in the last three elections (and I’m still kinda peeved about that last election) but that’s the extent of my political activity. So why do I feel the need to waste my time at work cruising the Internet for the latest political opinion? Why did I rush to Borders yesterday to buy Al Franken’s Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them (other than the fact the Al Franken makes my laugh out loud at work thus revealing to my co-workers that I’m reading when I should be working)? Why am I seriously trying to convert my husband over to our side and away from the Forces of Doom (he’s a registered Republican who thinks Reagan was the closest thing to the second coming of Christ we’ll see in our lifetime…I happen to think it’s Elvis but that’s another blog) when all he does during these conversations is snicker at my arguments and call me his poor confused baby while pouring me another martini?

Do I think Kerry is perfect? Not even. Was I ready to throw my martini at the TV last night when he brought up his stint in Viet Nam for the gazillionth time? Almost but then I would never waste good vodka. I would’ve thrown Larry's Coors Light instead but he had it nestled between his body and the couch where he fell asleep while reading comic books instead of even pretending to listen to what Kerry had to say. The damn Republican. I told him I was going to watch every night of the GOP convention because I want to make an informed decision on Election Day. And I’m gleefully looking forward to getting tipsy and shouting “Fascist Corporate Bitch!” repeatedly at Bush.

I live in Oklahoma. A redder than Red state. My husband is Republican. My dad is Republican. Everyone in my profession (accounting) is a Republican. I feel a little alone sometimes. We acquired a free used freezer the other day. After it arrived Larry shouted for me to hurriedly come to the garage and look at the new freezer. “It’s beautiful!” he squealed. What could be so freakin’ beautiful about a freezer? “The door!” On the door the previous owner had affixed numerous NRA stickers and one particularly large sticker proclaiming, “Charlton Heston is my president!” My dad nearly wept at the beauty of it. Husband and father then proceeded to toast the freezer and Charlton Heston with newly opened beers. I went inside and made a cocktail. Such is my political life.